When you are in a relationship with an alcoholic, you wait for the moment when your partner admits that they have a problem and are willing to make a change. In Crimson & Will’s Glue Film, Will talks openly about his alcoholism and the moment he made the choice to live a different life. He shares the catalyst that led him to speak the words: “I realized I had to make a change, so from that moment on I haven’t had a drink or any drugs.”
Leading up to his moment of choosing sobriety, he experienced what many considered to be no-big-deal. “Every once in a while on a Saturday night I would drink to black-out-point, and then I couldn’t be responsible for what I did.”
He shares his realization that he was incapable of a relationship as long as he experienced unaccountable periods, “How are you going to be responsible as a human being if you can’t remember what you did?”
Will’s final straw occurred in 2003, he recalls, “We were really partying hard, one of my employees at the time- we were horsing around, she tackled me, I pushed her off and she staggered and fell into a fireplace, she burned herself really bad…”
After that incident, the next couple of years were really hard, on both Crimson and Will, but Crimson stood by Will. Crimson shares, “I knew that at that point, he needed support. Some people would probably go running away, but I love Will, deeply.”
Hearing Crimson and Will’s story is powerful. It is amazing to see them together the way they are now, knowing that they went through such a rough patch. It’s powerful to watch Will speak so candidly about alcoholism, and to hear him admit, “Alcoholism doesn’t go away, I will always be that. But I know that I’m not going to drink. If I don’t have the first one, then I’m good, so I don’t have the first one.”
Part of the belief behind Global Glue Project is that hearing others’ stories and experiences can help us heal and become better human beings. This idea is closely related to recovery in traditional 12 Step Programs, where in meetings, members share their “Experience, strength, and hope. ” These shared stories have the capacity to shape our lives, by inspiring us with what’s possible.
Every relationship will have its challenges, some petty, some overwhelming. It is our ability to remember the love we have, even in the face of enormous difficulties, that will keep us going.
If you are married to an alcoholic, it is possible that your partner will hit their bottom and seek recovery. In recovery you often hear that an alcoholic must hit their bottom in order to seek a change. Will remembers hitting his bottom.
“You remember the storms, you forget about the sunny days. That was one of my storms, maybe the most important one in my life.” And he gratefully realizes that, “If I had continued to be that person, I probably wouldn’t be here right now, I’m pretty sure of that.”