Keeping the Fires Burning: Love Poetry To Keep a Relationship Strong

When we think of love poetry, we think of beginnings. They capture that swollen moment when you realize that you want to be with someone, that second where your heart beats faster, where hands touch in an orangish gloaming, and you know that your life is forever different. They are also really good at capturing ends: sad and tragic love songs about the one that got away, or a love that for whatever reason wasn’t meant to be. They are both about fire- either that sudden spark that causes an inferno or the fire that burnt twice as bright, but half as long.

What they generally fail to capture is the fire that doesn’t extinguish, but smolders, that lasts, maybe not with the same raging intensity, but with something more meaningful: that warming light which lasts comfortable until a new dawn. There are some poems and songs that capture what it means to be in a long-term relationship, and that help you keep a relationship strong. Global Glue is all about keeping people together, and we feel that this neglected corner of poetry  can help provide some guidance.

Keats: Endymion

We readily admit that John Keats- who is the epitome of the tragic romantic who died young, leaving only beauty in his wake- might be an odd choice for poems about long-term relationships. But Book I of his epic classic Endymion begins:

A thing of beauty is a joy forever:

It’s loveliness increases; it will never

Pass into nothingness, but still will keep

A bower quiet for us, and a sleep

Full of sweet dreams, and  health, and quiet breathing.

Your relationship is a thing of beauty, scars and troubles and disagreements and all. Keats reminds us that your love brought something beautiful into the world, and that beauty was your love. The world is made better when two people find a love, and even if that gets buried underneath the mundanity of everyday life, remember that its loveliness increases, simply by dint of endurance. There is a joy to that, that in a world rife with horror, there is still a space for your love, with its quiet breathing.

Keats
Keats, the quintessential Romantic poet. Image by wordfocus.com

Donne: Loves Growth

As we said in the introduction, love usually starts with a burst and then tempers off. We almost expect it to do so, and in a way, set ourselves up for that failure. We assume that things will become dull, but they don’t have to. We can understand that our lives are made richer by having someone to walk with, and that relationships can have passion simply by holding hands down that path. A relationship can be a constant surprise, and can keep growing, like spring grass, if you let it. Donne reminds us of this.

I scarce believe my love to be so pure

   as I thought it was

  because it doth endure

Vicissitude, and season, as the grass;

Me thinks I lied all winter, when I swore

My love was infinite, if spring make’it more

Yeats: The Coming of Wisdom With Time

Yeats is maybe the great poet of aging, even if he turned into a crank. Aging isn’t just about getting older- it is about getting wiser, too. Grow old with your partner not in years, but in experience, in shared moments, in the hard truths that are revealed when you, a flawed person, yoke your life to another. It’s exciting, and scary, but real knowledge comes from that.

Though leaves are many, the root is one;

Through all the lying days of my youth

I swayed my leaves and flowers in the sun

Now I may wither into the truth

Rumi: Music Masters (Coleman Barks translation)

Rumi is the explosive Persian poet of incandescent love and transcendental, lyrical, ecstatic sexual spirituality. Like Keats, it may seem strange to involve him in this. But he loved his Shams his whole life, and their relationship never stopped flowering, even when separated for years and by continents. The reason for this is because they both recognized each other as not just kindred spirits, but unique people.

When I’m with you, we stay up all night

When you’re not here, I can’t go to sleep

Praise God for these two insomnias!

And the difference between them

It’s easy to assume that even the person you are closest to is somehow a supporting player in your movie. We’re all the protagonist in our own lives. But always being fully aware that your partner is a person opens you up to thousands of those all-night conversations, where you can’t sleep, where you are exploring the depths of their minds, their hearts, their souls. A relationship is a constant adventure, a treasure hunt to find the other person. And, as Rumi reminds us, the hunt isn’t that far.

The minute I heard my first love story

I started looking for you, not knowing

how blind that was

Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere

They’re in each other all along

Share your favorite love poetry, and don’t miss out on upcoming Global Glue talks- get your tickets today!

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